Even through napping, I was still very productive yesterday. I finished the last gift bag, finished another bag that I’ve had cut out for years, and also this little clutch that goes with the bag. It was so easy and only took 3 pieces of material.
I don’t why – sometimes – it takes me so long to get things done. Do I just love the process so much I just don’t want it to end? Do I just like being busy, and the thought of having nothing to do – and being alone with my thoughts – scare me? (To be honest, it scares a lot of people, but that’s what counselors are for, and they do do a good job, if we just listen.)
I have found that having too many things to do, too many projects cut out on my table at the same time is overwhelming. I just don’t know what to do or where to start. SO much stuff clutters the mind. There have been scientific studies that show if people have too many choices, like more than 3, they just feel overwhelmed and don’t make a choice at all; or people feel stressed by so many choices that it’s a hindrance on their lives.
I get that way, really. If there are too many things going on at once, I often don’t know where to start. So I limit my choices. Now, sometimes that’s not possible, so I try to focus on just one thing. Start with just one thing, and forget about the rest, for now, and go from there. So, for example, I’ll start with finishing this bag and clutch that has been cut out for years. I won’t look at anything else on my table but that. I’ll finish that project, put it away, and then find something else that needs to be done. So starting with just one thing, and finishing that, helps me to focus and then move on to the other one thing that needs to be done, and before I know it, I’ve finished about 3 things (which I did yesterday, YAY!)
So finishing these projects was my motivation. Now I feel a sense of accomplishment and I can move on to the next one thing.
Every day is like Sunday around here…for the dogs. They get to lie around, get some good treats and food, chase squirrel at the park, and bark at scary people to protect their house. When I die, I want to come back as one of my dogs (or cats, they have it even better)
Today I need to work on the last handbag I have left for gifts, and start putting together my project for the fashion show coming up next year. I’ve started putting together some swatches of fabric, and I’ve drawn my design, all that’s the easy part. The hard part is figuring out how to put it all together. One thing at a time, and it will all come together the way it’s supposed to.
It’s so nice out I’ve got the windows open, playing some awesome music – which I need to work to – and just enjoying the change in the weather. Oh, and tea, I have tea, of course.
When I went looking for the new site for Se7enBites the other day, I came across a whole new set of graffiti art. I really like this one, it’s kind of zen like and reminds me of a mandala. I wish it wasn’t covered by so many weeds though.
Nevertheless, it has been so nice out lately! FINALLY! we have had a break in the weather! It’s been in the 60’s at night, and was in the 70’s here during the day. I went to yoga this morning and when I left, my clothes weren’t sticking to me. It was awesome. It’s the little things, right?
I am glad for the change in weather as it has helped me with another change: menopause. It’s not officially official (as I don’t have my blood test results back yet, but…) but I can tell something strange is going on. The biggest change, and the most difficult for me, is my hair. Not only is it getting grayer, it is becoming more wiry and not as manageable. It’s like it has taken on a life of its own. It doesn’t flow the same and it’s starting to, like, style itself; you know what I mean? It’s starting to fall a different way and part itself a different way and do all these weird things it never did before. And my mother is no help as she had a hysterectomy in her mid 30’s so she can’t tell me anything about her issues. So I’m flying blind here and feeling like I am going crazy. Sometimes I feel hungry but then I don’t but then when I go to eat it’s like I’ve been starved for days. (I really look ridiculous eating so fast.) Then my body decides that it’s had enough sleep at 3 am and then my brain says ‘no’ but the body says ‘good luck getting back to sleep lady. maybe in 2 hours’ then that makes me tired during the day and round about 1p all I want to do is nap for hours.
I can’t even eat fruit right out of the fridge my teeth hurt. I have to let things get to room temperature before I eat or drink stuff. My contacts don’t like my eyes anymore so I can’t focus properly and my eyes get tired fast. And my skin is SO DRY I have taken to using olive oil on my face for moisturizer.
Don’t laugh, it works. Otherwise, I am constantly plying my face with lotion you’d think I was spackling a hole in drywall. Which, it almost feels like I am.
This has all been so much easier on the dogs than it has been on me or for my husband. He just doesn’t get it, and I don’t know that any man will. I’m not being sexist, it just is what it is. A little patience, compassion, and understanding would really help though, and maybe they could hide in their man-cave until this is all over? Maybe I should have my own woman-cave (or just stay in my crafty room and get me a futon in there) until this passes. Of course, cats and puppies will always be welcome, but anyone else may want to stay away. I have become so irritable at the stupidest things that some days I don’t even like being around myself.
A small consolation is that all these changes have come on pretty fast, so I am hoping that means that menopause will come through like a tidal wave, gather up all this crap, and take it back out with it out to sea as quickly as it came in.
When I moved into my house, the first thing I wanted to do was xeriscape my yard. I am not big on wasting money and water in making sure I have green grass all the time. The earth doesn’t work that way, that’s why there are seasons and plants go dormant. Florida is one of the few states that seems to demand that homeowners make sure that their landscaping is pristine and manicured all. the. time. I have better things to do.
In the 20 years I have been here my yard has grown a LOT and to me, it is perfect. Lots of easy to maintain plants, I use no pesticides nor irrigation, and except for a dry season, I think it looks pretty damn good. (I have some uptight neighbors that would disagree, but I don’t maintain my yard for them.)
Since I am a big animal lover, and my cats are indoor/outdoor, I have left a water bowl in the front yard under the roof drip line, so when it rains, the water bowl gets refilled, which happens a lot. I know other animals use it to, there are a couple stray neighborhood cats that I’ve seen drink out of it. I think one of those stray cats lives in my front yard.
I am very happy and honored to be able to provide such a place for nature, to be a steward of this environment and to be able to preserve and protect it. I hope you can find the same joy in your environment. Enjoy it while you can.
Now I’m not one to complain about eating in a hurry. When I’m hangry I need to eat now and not just some “nutrition” bar, I need food. I’vealways found eating to be a perfunctory activity, something I needed to do in order to move on to the next project or adventure or activity, not really something I put a lot of thought into. I don’t live to eat, I eat to live.
Reading, on the other hand, has been something I’ve been in love with since I discovered books (whether I could read them or not. Some had pictures, right?) I could spend days just absorbed in them. I remember as a child I was sick with a cold or flu or something and spent an inordinate amount of time in bed, so my mom bought me these dinosaur books. About 5 hardcover books with illustrations of the different dinosaurs and their names and whether they were carnivores or herbivores and where their bones were found. These were easy reads, only about 20 pages in each book. But I remember reading them and reading them and reading them until the spines started to give out I read them so much. They just fascinated me. I really wanted to be an archaeologist at that point but then I found out that you had to know something about science and anatomy since I am really no good at that stuff I gave up on the degree seeking part and now I just study their history. I could still end up being a history teacher.